Where did my son go? He seemed upset that I couldn’t keep playing with him, but I had a job to do. I was planning to spend more time with him once I finished my work. I thought he would understand. But now he is nowhere to be found. Maybe he’ll return when I’m finished with my obligations. But I have a feeling he won’t. I missed out.
The beast wants out. A dose of sunlight from my Gun del Sol settles it down for now. I’d better hurry and drag this casket outside so I can put the monster trapped inside out of its misery. The scraping of wood upon the dungeon’s cobblestones makes me a target for monsters in the area. Normally I’d simply sneak past them, but that’s not a possibility now. It takes me a few minutes to attend to the unwanted company. While I’m occupied, my prisoner begins making so much fuss that the coffin shuffles about, as if of its own accord. Nice try, but you’re not getting away that easily. I press forward and soon the dungeon’s entrance is in sight. The blazing sun is a sight for sore eyes. Perfect weather for erasing an Immortal from existence.
Goodbye, my dear. I am glad you were my companion on our journey. Yes, at times being together was difficult. In fact, it would have probably been easier if I had gone alone. But it would not have been anywhere near as rewarding. And now you are gone. Without you, what is the point in moving forward? What is the point of anything we do, really? No matter how many treasures we accumulate… Now matter how far we travel… We all end up in the same place.
Grandpa will just have to wait. I was on my way to help him in the vegetable garden when a couple emergencies arose. The pansies are wilting, so I need to hurry and take care of them. But Papa is freaking out because the apple tree needs attention, and he can’t take care of it by himself. Mama’s work is never done, it seems. Don’t worry, everyone! Mama will take care of it… Like I always do… Day after day after day. Isn’t gardening supposed to be relaxing? Maybe I should’ve just stuck to cooking.
They haven’t given up, I’ll give them that. For the past few days, five feline adventurers have attempted to free me from my prison. Alas, the room I’m trapped in is pitch black, and the brave kitties can’t make any headway on liberating me. Maybe it’s all in vain. I almost feel guilty that so much effort is being wasted on me. I think I hear them approaching now. Yes, they’ve entered the room. I’m ready for another disappointment. Wait a minute. What’s this? A light?! Yes! One of the brave warriors has used magic to illuminate the room! Hooray! But… oh no. There are two armored ghosts guarding my cage. At least my would-be rescuers can see what they’re up against. They swing their swords with mighty blows, but it’s not enough defeat my captors. The cats make their retreat. Still, this is progress. This gives me hope. Perhaps tomorrow I shall be free. But for now, I guess there’s nothing to do but be patient.
My son is supposed to be getting ready for bed, so what the heck is with all that noise? I hear lots of laughter and what sounds like yelling and grunting coming from upstairs. I decide I’d better head up there and investigate. When I enter my boy’s room, it all makes sense: He got his hands on my DSi and is playing Photo Dojo. I haven’t played the game in months, and I doubt my little guy remembers back to when I snapped photos and recorded voice clips of him for the game. All he knows is it’s absolutely hilarious to see tiny versions of the two of us fighting on the DSi’s screen. “Look, Daddy! I’m beating you!” The Photo Dojo version of me emits repeated cries of despair as it is pummeled by my son’s in-game alter ego. Taunts boasting “You’re weak!” come thorugh the DSi’s speakers. I leave my son to his fun while I go brush my teeth, hoping that tonight I can somehow manage to stay awake long enough so that I can get a turn playing Photo Dojo, too.
Just as expected, Yellow has the ship in position. In but a few more steps I’ll jump aboard and we’ll make our escape. Or so I thought. Without warning, an enormous robot rises up and grabs the craft. I stop dead in my tracks. The robot gets right down to business and begins its onslaught, intent on smashing me with Yellow’s ship. My attacker is slow, though, and I sidestep its blows with minimal effort. Yellow looks understandably confused by what’s happening. It’s almost endearing. Enough horsing around. I’d better save her, not to mention my ticket out of here. If that craft gets smashed, I can kiss my chances of survival goodbye. It takes a substantial deal of firepower to put a dent in the robot, but eventually my blasts cause it to let go of the ship. It’s time to finish this. Not a problem. Easy as pie. Like shooting fish in a barrel. I almost feel insulted by how little the opposing force must think of me if this is the best they can do. With the final shots fired, Yellow and I zoom off, but it looks like we’re not getting off that easy after all. There are enemies closing in quickly. It’s about time somebody woke these jokers up. I pull out my favorite weapon and get ready to rock.
So far, Lady Luck has been on my side. While the journey up the mountainside has been treacherous for my opponents, it’s been nothing but smooth sailing for me. My good fortune is making me feel a bit cocky, truth be told. I roll the dice and land two 6s, which allows me to roll an additional time for a total of 17. At this rate the treasure will be mine in no time. See you later, suckers! I jog forward, thinking only of the gold waiting at the summit, when the unthinkable happens. The space I land on forces me to switch places with another player, landing me at the back of the pack! To make matters worse, the next roll finds me tumbling through the ground and into the belly of the volcano. I suppose this is what I deserve for acting so pompous. It’s going to take a lot of skill — and even more luck — to escape from here and reclaim the lead.
K.K. Slider never lets his fans down. Rain or shine, he kicks out the jams each and every Saturday night. This week, however, is a bit different. K.K. arrives at his usual venue only to find himself in the middle of a brawl involving what appears to be a grizzled soldier, a pink blob, a flatulent gnome, and a blue hedgehog in sneakers. Not necessarily the ideal conditions for a performance. Nevertheless, the show must go on! K.K. grabs his guitar, takes a breath, and dives right into rousing rendition of “Go K.K. Rider!”
As we round the corner, I’m caught off guard by a helicopter hovering closely above the track. I lose my concentration and overcompensate for the turn, bumping into the car next to me. The driver takes advantage of the situation and uses the momentum from the collision to jettison ahead into first place. Damn it, we’re too close to the finish line for mistakes like this. I find my way into my rival’s slipstream and cut the distance between us inch-by-inch. Finally it’s time to make my move. I fire off the last of my nitrous and make a break for the finish line. We’re seconds away. This is going to be close!