A birthday gift from Daddy for a car-obsessed toddler: Cars for the Xbox 360! My son hops into my lap and soon we’re racing around the town of Radiator Springs as Lightning McQueen. Okay, what to do first? We drive around aimlessly for a few minutes then finally stumble upon a racing event. Apparently this stuffy British car ventured over to “our side of the pond” to race the great Lightning McQueen. Well, we’re about to give you what for, buddy. The race begins and we speed off… but my son quickly loses interest after the first lap and climbs out of my lap, making his way over to play with his toy cars. “Hey, don’t you want to sit with Daddy and play the game?” Apparently not. I power off the 360, head over to where my son is sitting, plop down next to him, and we push around the toy cars together. “Vrooom vroom!” He’s right. This is more fun.
I need to reach the goal, but there are some disgusting enemies blocking my way. And by “disgusting” I mean seriously disgusting. If I’m not careful, I could be on the receiving end of mucous, stinky armpit hair, or poop. The problem is that each time I move, they move. I’ve got to be smart and plan each step out ahead of time. I’m methodically inching my way toward where I want to be, but a flying butt is making its way towards me. Finally I’m in what seems to be the home stretch, but I make a wrong move and become trapped. The butt corners me and before I know it I’m covered in… well, you don’t want to know.